Couples Therapy
A Gentle Guide to the Journey We Take Together
Every relationship goes through seasons — the bright ones, the tender ones, the messy ones, and the ones where you suddenly wonder, “How did we end up here?”
If you’re reading this because you’re considering couples work, please know this: you’re not alone, and nothing is “broken” about you.Couples therapy is not a last resort.
It’s a way back to clarity, connection, and the deeper truth of who you are together.
So… what is couples therapy, really?
In my way of working, couples therapy is a safe and steady space where we slow down the patterns that keep looping — the misunderstandings, the shutdowns, the escalating conversations that started as something small.
We look at what’s happening between you, but also what each of you carries within you: old loyalties, survival strategies, attachment patterns, unspoken longings, and the stories you’ve learned to tell yourselves about love.
You don’t have to come with the “right words.”
You only need the willingness to show up.
How sessions usually unfold
When you sit with me, I bring a neutral and compassionate presence.
We take time — real time — to hear each of you without interruption, defensiveness, or rushing to fix.
A few things we explore together:
• Communication that goes deeper than words
What you say matters, but how you say it — and what your nervous system is expressing — often tells the true story. We get curious about that together.
• Old patterns that still run the show
Most couples fight about the present, but the roots often lie in the past.
Your histories travel with you into the relationship, and therapy helps you see which patterns are yours — and which no longer serve you.
• What still works between you
Even when things feel shaky, there is almost always something tender, loyal or hopeful still alive. We name that too, because it reminds you why you chose each other.
• Practical, grounded tools
Small exercises you can use at home to interrupt old habits and create new moments of connection — breathing together, pausing before reacting, touch-based regulation, reflective listening, and simple rituals that support repair.
When is couples therapy helpful?
Here are a few common reasons couples reach out:
Communication that keeps derailing
Feeling unseen or unheard
Emotional distance
Repeated conflict
Different needs or expectations
Infidelity or breaches of trust
Navigating life transitions
Losing the sense of “us”
You don’t have to be in crisis to benefit.
Many couples come simply because they want a stronger, more conscious relationship.
What this work is not
It’s not about choosing sides.
It’s not about proving who’s right.
And it’s not about “fixing” one partner.
It’s about understanding the dynamic you create together — the dance you’re both part of — and learning new ways to meet each other with openness instead of defense.
My approach: systemic, intuitive, embodied
With nearly four decades of systemic and intuitive work, I guide couples by looking at the bigger field around the relationship:
family systems and inherited patterns
attachment dynamics
the emotional body
unspoken expectations
the deeper longing at the heart of the conflict
I use a mix of systemic constellations, somatic awareness, dialogical exercises, and compassionate inquiry.
Some sessions are spacious and emotional, others are practical and solution-focused.
Always, the aim is the same:
to help you reconnect with yourselves and with each other.
Does it help?
Most couples who enter this work with sincerity — even when it’s uncomfortable — find more clarity, compassion, and choice.
Sometimes that means healing the relationship.
Sometimes it means making conscious decisions about the future.
Either way, you grow. You learn. You leave with more self-knowledge and more inner strength.
A final word
If you’re thinking about therapy as a couple, that already tells me something important:
you care enough to try.
You don’t need to have everything figured out before you come.
We take the first step together.
Whenever you’re ready, I’m here.
Warm regards,
Jacqueline Kleve
Ζακλιν Κλέβε